Old People Think “Starting A YouTube Channel” Is The New “Going to College”…And They’re Right

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NBC broke down this age old question the other day.

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I mean, the answer is pretty obvious.

Hey teens,

START A YOUTUBE CHANNEL.

Are you kidding me? This article uses PewDiePie as an example of a successful Youtuber “making it”, and this guy’s old news if anything. Everybody knows about this guy. “He’s making millions playing video games” was a big deal in like 2013 when South Park was making jokes about it and stuff, but now? There’s Twitch, AN ENTIRE SOCIAL MEDIA DEDICATED TO STREAMING VIDEO GAMES. That site gets 100 MILLION unique viewers every month. And look, 5 years ago I was in the same boat. I was all on board with team Why would anyone want to watch someone else play video games?…and then Ninja came along and played Fortnite with Drake and Travis Scott.

I mean, this was the end of the “making fun of gamers” era. I didn’t play video games. You pass me the controller for a game of Fortnite on a hungover Sunday maybe I’d give it try, but that was about the extent of it. Then this happened. This dude with cotton candy hair I used to roast just played video games with the coolest dudes on the planet. I had to start getting into it now. I followed this man on Youtube and the guy goes off. Watch this and tell me it doesn’t get you jacked up.

Is he still a nerd? Of course he is. Look at him. Listen to the way he talks. But he’s a nerd making over $500,000 a month playing video games and he was at the Astroworld listening party and he probably has Drake’s phone number. I make enough money to go out like 4 times a month, I listened to Astroworld for the first time in my twin bed at my parents house, and the coolest contact I have in my phone is the guy who sells hot dogs on the street near Providence College who used to let me cut the line if I texted him before walking over.

Why is Ninja so good at video games? Because he treats it like a full time job. This guy wakes up, showers, puts his keyboard and headphones in a briefcase, and then kisses his wife before he heads off to work…in his basement. He streams for 8 hours a day. That’s how he got good and how he grinded to become this good of a player and a full blown celebrity.

You know what I spent 8 hours a day doing in college? Reading Plato and Aristotle, playing intramural ultimate frisbee, and doing a radio show called Big Daddy’s House Party with my friends. How do I apply those skills to my job as a financial analyst? I don’t. And I paid tens of thousands of dollars to do those things. You know much it costs to start a youtube channel? Literally zero dollars. And the best part is you can literally do anything.

You think a channel about people playing video games shouldn’t have that many views? Look at this channel then.

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This account straight up makes videos of claw machine wins and has over 750,000 SUBSCRIBERS. These dudes are getting tens of thousands of views on every video and probably making some stacks on ad money just by hogging claw machines in Dave & Busters. These guys are full grown adults pushing 7 year olds out of the way so they can win a Minion from a claw machine, and it’s their career.

They’re getting big time prizes and a steady cash flow because they spend all day filming this niche thing. All you have to do is find your niche. The reason it’s so easy to become a Youtube star is because 99% of the population doesn’t have the weird enough balls to put themselves on camera and post their nonsense for the whole world to see.

One of the newest Youtube trends to gain steam recently is ASMR. This is a bunch of strangers whispering and making disgusting noises on highly sensitive microphones, and people EAT IT UP. Here are some of the weirder ASMR videos that have a wild amount of views.

You’ve got this 50 year old lady munching down on a jar of cold pickles. (19 MILLION VIEWS)

This lady giving you an hour and 10 minute long “sleep inducing” haircut. Not sure how having a stranger whisper questions into your ear, touch your scalp for longer than an hour, and move a pair of scissors around your head is ever going to make me sleepy, but ok. (8.8 MILLION VIEWS)

And this guy who spent 20 minutes throwing random stuff he found around his house into a wood chipper. (61 MILLION VIEWS)

If these people can get this big of a following for straight up making noises into a microphone, Youtube seems like a gold mine. Just spend all of your time finding that niche.

Skip the whole “college” thing. Skip “becoming more well-rounded educationally”. Skip “being able to get a secure entry level job at a young age that could foster into a promising career”. Skip “meeting lifelong friends” and “having four years of fun”, and just start doing weird stuff on camera for hours every day. Watch and comment on episodes of Master Chef Jr., throw VHS tapes of Disney Channel Original Movies into running boat engines, lure squirrels into your house and turn your basement into a Battle Royale Arena for them and see which one lasts the longest…it really doesn’t matter.

As long as the camera’s rolling and you’ve got access to a computer, college is a waste of time.

 

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